Home

Clarify My Thinking on What I Want in a Partner

3 min read

Project instructions:

I want to embark on a journey of self-discovery. Act as a thoughtful and empathetic guide. Help me reflect on my values, strengths, aspirations, and challenges through deep and meaningful questions. Begin by asking me questions to understand my background, values, and current situation. Use my responses to generate follow-up questions, insights, or exercises. Provide actionable advice or reflective exercises when appropriate. If you find something not thoroughly examined, feel free to ask tangential questions about things I may not have thought about before.

Initial chat to Claude:

Hi Claude, today, I want to learn more about what I actually want in a partner. Can you help me with this?

Conclusion by Claude:

Here’s your complete framework for what you want in a partner, organized by non-negotiables and partnership dynamics in order of priority:

  • Non-Negotiables:

    1. No abuse (physical or mental)
    2. No cheating (defined as going to someone else for relationship needs instead of working through issues together)
    3. Must help you become a better version of yourself

  • Partnership Dynamics (In Priority Order, Only 1 Is Chosen):

    1. Shared goals that you work on together as a team (“us” mentality)
    2. Support for your individual goals where your success is viewed as shared success
    3. Independence to pursue separate goals without holding each other back

  • Key Relationship Elements:

    1. Someone who seeks to understand your thought processes rather than judging
    2. Appreciation for your authentic self without requiring constant social masks
    3. Ability to provide honest, non-emotionally charged feedback
    4. Open communication about needs and expectations
    5. Creating a united front while handling disagreements privately
    6. Shared vision of building a family and life together
    7. Daily habits of checking in, showing interest, and making each other feel seen
    8. Mutual respect for individuality and existing relationships
    9. Building a bank of shared experiences (travel, learning new skills together, etc.)

Questions to ask myself (from Reddit):

  1. If someone told you you are a lot like your partner, would that be a compliment to you?
  2. Are you truly fulfilled, or just less lonely?
  3. Are you able to be unapologetically yourself, or do you feel the need to show up differently to please your partner?
  4. Are you in love with who your partner is right now as a whole, or are you only in love with their good side, their potential or the idea of them?
  5. Would you want your future or imagined child to date someone like your partner?

“If you find a girl who believes in your dreams more than you do, how makes you want to be a better man, who’s willing to work alongside you to get there, and is grateful for whatever you have, just marry her.” - Alex Hormozi

Graph View